Fighting the Conventional Life
I’ve often wondered how it is that some people find it so easy to get up at 4am, get dressed, and go to the gym before showering and then going to work an 8-10 hour day or more. Just thinking about this makes me tired. I’m almost convinced that this energy level and mental drive must be genetic. I certainly don’t have it and envy those that do.
Just the other day I received an email from a reader, Janet, who enjoys sewing just like I do, and was a successful quilter at one time, winning a number of contests for her creations, however, she has put up her sewing machine because her “other” job takes up so much of her time. By the time she gets home from work from her full-time job she is completely wiped out, with barely enough energy to cook dinner and care for her family before retiring for the evening. The weekends for her are not much better as she spends time cleaning and doing laundry. So her sewing machine sits in a closet unused.
I know how she feels. I have had many moments in my life when I have put my creative energy on the back burner. It has been during these times, too, that I haven’t been my happiest. It is only when I am creating and doing something that I am passionate about that I find I am my happiest – even when times are tough, if I am painting or sewing or quilting, I am happy. And, from the tone of Janet’s email, I sensed that she wasn’t her happiest – and probably because she has neglected her creative self.
I struggle too. It’s like being stuck in the middle of conflicting voices in our head or a fly between two swatters. For me, I have so many things going on, I don’t know what hat to wear first! I struggle with organizing my time so that I enjoy all aspects of my life and not just a few. Getting one’s butt in gear while the “energy draining non-artful life” is tugging away at the back of your brain and the “fear of creative failure” is tugging away at the front is exhausting.
Structure can be a tough nail to hammer too. If like me, you have a rather unstructured life and kind of wing-it every day, then you may find that that can be just as difficult pulling yourself out of this rut as anything else you want to do. I sew when I want, paint when I want, nap when I want, and work on this blog when I want. I also do laundry and clean the kitchen when I want although that needs to be done on a daily basis or I end up with a really nasty situation. I also homeschool the children and unlike most other aspects of my life, that is structured. The children know what their assignments are for the day before the day begins and they know that as soon as they finish their breakfast, it is on to the schoolwork. There is some comfort, I suppose, in knowing what the day holds in store.
For someone like Janet who works a full-time job and has a family, finding the time to do something that you really enjoy, whether it is a hobby or a second career can’t be easy. If nothing else, it is down-right difficult – but not impossible. My suggestion to Janet was to carve out 2 days a week to start, to do what she loves to do – and in her case it is sewing and quilting. In other words, she should maybe choose an hour after work on a Tuesday (or any day of the week) to sew. She should have her machine and supplies set up and ready to go when she gets home. She should take some time to make herself some hot tea and relax and get on her slippers. Then she can focus on her creative wares and after an hour or so, put it away and tend to her family responsibilities. Janet’s next day of sewing should be on the weekend when hopefully, she can devote a few more hours to her craft. Carving out a time that she won’t let anybody in the family distract her and take her away from her plans is important to getting back in the saddle of her creative self.
As I see it, just having the machine and all your supplies set up is motivation enough to sit down at your sewing machine and create. She’ll probably even discover that she can make more time for what she loves to create once she sets it all up and it is begging her for attention – kinda like the kids.
For endless inspiration, visit some of my favorite places on the web:
Rosy Little Things by Alicia Paulson
Hello My Name is Heather by Heather Bailey
Celebrate Creativity by Lisa Tutman-Oglesby
The Quilt Show with Alex Anderson
Studio Art Quilt Associates Charlotte Warr Anderson Pictorial Quilts
These are just a few of my favorite creative friends on the web. Check them out! In the meantime, pull out your sewing machine, dust it off, dig out some fabric, and play. You won’t regret it.
The beautiful mini quilts featured in this post are from:
Elizabeth Ruffing
www.elizabethruffing.com
www.ruffings.com
Comments (4)
Jessie
January 15, 2010 at 1:25 pm
Happy anniversary to you two! What a wonderful way to share your sentiments with each other.
I am grateful for this post (and its list of beautiful, creative links to visit, some of which are my favorites, some of which I’ll enjoy discovering because of your post).
My husband and I are approaching an exciting transition point in our lives where we are looking forward to moving to a new town, buying our first house, trying to have children, and for him, finally embarking on his first career position after all the many years of training and preparation.
One of the reasons we are so close, is that we have come to an agreement about our life’s values, much as the two of you have. We don’t value the rat race life of constant work and acquisition that much of America seems to. We have decided from the beginning that we will always choose better work hours (allowing for plenty of time spent with family) over promises of ever more money.
That being said, the real reason your post was so attractive to me at this opportune time in my life is the beautiful pictures of artists’ studios!!! Usually, I would notice these pictures in passing, but they wouldn’t really apply to me. But now we are beginning to dream of the type of house we can afford in the small town we are moving to, and because of your post I will have a better eye for seeing how a little creative use of space will give me the little sewing and crafting niche I crave. I love what people are able to do with some bright paint and creative furniture pieces.
I also agree with your advice to your reader. Life is empty if we don’t carve out time for family and creativity. And I know even you have struggled with making it work; it’s a constant battle no matter what one’s career looks like.
Cheers to having a spouse with the same values!
Susan
January 16, 2010 at 1:50 am
Hi Jessie! Thank you SO much for your comment! Sounds like you and your hubby have a wonderful life ahead. There will be ups and downs, good times and bad times, happy times and sad times, easy times and extremely difficult times – but what makes it all possible in this journey we call life is knowing that we have someone beside us that adores us. Someone that loves us and cares for us, even when we are sick and disgusting – or not very pleasant. Someone that won’t walk away from responsibility but embrace it.
When Bob and I first married 17 years ago, we were both 33 years old. Between the 2 of us we had 1 queen size bed, and a very small 4 drawer chest that I purchased at an estate sale. That and our computers and clothes on our backs. I got pregnant with Sarah 5 months after we married and quit working outside the home 7 months later. When I was about 4 months pregnant, he bought me a Kenmore Sewing machine – it was my first sewing machine, and I couldn’t wait to learn how to use it. I bought a book on quilting and taught myself. I had so much fun! I couldn’t wait to make creative decisions that made our home (even if it was a crappy apartment) a special home for our new family.
I have a feeling that you are going to have a great time picking out paint (and paint can make a huge difference in the feeling you get when in a room). Paint, fabric, pillows, quilts, little knik-knaks and pictures. Hey, Martha Stewart is a great place to pick up some creative ideas!
Have fun, Jessie and enjoy the journey. Just know this – marriage is like a roller-coaster, it’s a slow ride to the top, and a helluva drop when things crash, but then they level out and you’re both speeding along the bumpy ride of life together. My advice is to jump in the front seat together, buckle up, and hold your hands in the air – scream and then enjoy the breeze, because before you know it the ride is over, your journey together has come to an end, and suddenly you realize just how precious life is – and short.
– Susan
Big Bear
January 14, 2010 at 6:17 pm
ps. Happy 17th Anniversary 😉
Big Bear
January 14, 2010 at 6:16 pm
We made a personal decision almost 17 years ago to unplug from the traditional / conventional life that most everyone is so conditioned to…. so accepting of… We chose to place the emphasis on family first, fully accepting all that that brings… Most importantly, more quality time with the family… learning together, growing together…sharing the good, the bad, and sometimes the ugly too. It has afforded us many blessings and quite a few challenges along the way. We would like to think that it has, in some small way, made each of us better … as a person, parent, and friend. It has allowed us to follow our passions and to be creative on many levels…. Art, Music, Crafts, and yes…. Blogs. For all the Ups, Downs, and comfortable moments spent coasting… I would not change a thing or trade a moment that we have shared together! See sweetie…. what I said almost 17 years ago did indeed turn out to be true… Our life will be an adventure…. everyday